As Graceful as an...Elephant

Yesterday afternoon I decided to check out the skating rink in front of city hall. I had not been there for a couple of years and had heard of the extended runway through the park. My visions of swooshing elegantly through the throngs of people were shattered when I tried to brake for the first time. I nearly fell over my feet and had to grab the boards in order to stop. Odd. I tried once more and realised I could only skate straight ahead like a train on tracks. Then I remembered that I had had my skates sharpened at Eislaufverein the last time I was there. They apparently had given the blades a hollow cut which meant I could no longer brake by tilting the skates to the side. Scary! I skated for more than half an hour like an absolute beginner with raw eggs instead of skates. Not exactly my idea of fun. As the crows became denser, I decided to call it a day and headed towards the service station, skates in hand, to explain my dilemma. For 6 EUR the guys on duty gave them another cut. Somewhat suspicious I tried them (the skates, not the guys...) out before heading home, relieved to find out I could once more stop without frantically grabbing the boards.