Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Is It Just Me or Is Everything Shit?

Before you think I'm in a suicidal mood, that's the title of the book I just finished. Its subtitle is "The Encyclopedia of Modern Life" and it's basically just one long rant of its two authors, Alan McArthur and Steve Lowe. After I had read a favourable review in a magazine (I believe it was in one of TD's lad's mags) I knew I just had to order it straight away.

Well, I was not disappoined as I totally agree that the majority of the phenomena and protagonists of "modern life" the authors so mercilessly bitch about are pretty ridiculous. Ok, there was no need really for them to slag off MY Robbie, the one for whom I risked frostbite but then again they do have a point. Sort of. Some of the A- and B-list celebs they dismantle are not well-known outside the British isles but that didn't spoil the superbly written rant-fest for me. Loved it.
If I were to write a similar book right now, the title would go something like "Is it Just Me or Are Japanese Bureaucrats Worse Than Any Other?" Alternatively "If there Were an Offense Called Japonicide, I'd Be Very Tempted Indeed to Commit it. With My Bare Hands".

One of the wonderful new tasks yours truly recently was made in charge of is the revamping of our website. In spite of the fact that I have the web-designing skills of a (broken) vacuum cleaner I'm pretty confident that I can manage with MS Frontpage and the templates we got from Big Brother in Japan. My boss asked me to tell him how long the revamping process would approximately take so he could report that back to Japan. Well, not actually that long if I bloody had a computer that doesn't bloody crash in 5-minute intervals. Data for our website is on a "special" computer conveniently not located in my room but upstairs, right next to boss's desk. He's aware that said computer is on the fast track to the happy hunting grounds of tech-waste and has wisely applied for the budget to buy a new one. It's just not sure when and IF Big Brother in Japan will o.k. the frivolous purchase. And no, we don't have any other spare computers in the house so if anybody's workstation dies, they better acquaint themselves with the retro charm of the common typewriter. I wouldn't mind working from my computer either, but, alas, I don't have Japanese software installed. As I don't understand Japanese, that tragic lack has not worried me too much up to now but it means that I wouldn't be able to open/work with the Japanese templates which contain Japanese source-code. Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. So far, none of our in-house erm...experts (computer skills, vacuum cleaner, broke, see above) has been able to tell me where I could download/obtain it.

The ironic thing is that before my mysterious upgrade some weeks ago, one could actually switch to Japanese on my computer. Yeah, I know, never ask "why".

No lunch-break purchases apart from a watch battery and a Subway sub (6" veggie, for the record). What was a veritable winter wonderland this morning has since turned into the usual snow-in-the-city nightmare with passing cars spraying you in brown slush and I therefore decided to abort my rambling and return to Coma HQ earlier than usual.


Anonymous novala said...

MS Frontpage? Haha, have fun ...

2/07/2006 06:20:00 PM  
Blogger ka-ma said...

Can I co-author the Japonicide book? Pleeeeese, pleeeese, pretty pleeese!

2/08/2006 12:39:00 AM  
Blogger onemorehandbag said...

Novala: Frontpage is the least of my worries and does the job just fine for this simple template we got which doesn't even use frames.

Ka-ma: Oooooh, yes, that'd be great! Well, as long as I get to rake in say...90% of the royalties, of course.

2/08/2006 09:00:00 AM  
Anonymous novala said...

I am truly happy to read that! :-)

2/08/2006 05:28:00 PM  

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